"If we could only see what we're becoming"

I did it!

I've been imagining what this last day would feel like all summer. Not so much in an attempt to make time go by faster or due to the anticipation of returning home, but just out of genuine curiosity as to how I will feel once my trip is all behind me & my Fellowship experience a thing of the past. Now that the day is here, I think I don't realize that in 24 hours I'll be boarding a plane to a different country & my Brueggeman trip will be a collection of memories. Well, of course it is more than simply that, as this summer & my experience as a Brueggeman Fellow has undoubtedly changed me in many ways. I have my memories, but more importantly, I have myself & the person that I will continue to be as life moves on.

As I mentioned, I don't completely understand this is my last day in Costa Rica. What do you mean I'm not coming into the office next Monday? What do you mean that soon I will be in a country where I have cell phone service & air conditioning & more English than I have heard in the past two months? I'll be able to drive again? Prices will be listed in dollars? For anyone who has spent a few months abroad, you may understand my thought process. It is certainly going to be weird going back to the US, and even weirder leaving this life behind.

This trip has challenged me in every way possible, and I am definitely better for it. I set out to learn new things & explore a new place in the world. I have learned more about universal & community-based health initiatives. SO MUCH NEW KNOWLEDGE. It's great. The work experience has been HARD and super stressful, but I wouldn't change a thing. The experience I have gained is absolutely invaluable & will certainly help me as I go through the rest of my time at Xavier, shaping my career goals & dreams. Though oftentimes I was pushed beyond my limits, I wouldn't change a thing. Though I am immensely proud of myself for powering through every difficult moment this summer, I can say that it certainly wasn't me that got me through the tough times - God is good to me. I've been blessed with gifts, talents, and certain characteristics that carried me through this summer. Those & other blessings, not derived from myself, made this trip possible. So, thanks to God for that.

I am very proud of all the other Fellows. We work hard & this is not something for everyone. I've said it before & I will say it again - the Fellows are amazing!!

There has been one song which I think has really defined the Fellowship experience: "To the Dreamers" by For King & Country. They are an awesome band. Their music is really upbeat & positive, which is why I like it! I highly recommend checking them out. Whenever this song up while I was on the bus, I would always listen to it a few times because I really connected it with my experiences. I've so graciously supplied the song below for your viewing pleasure. While listening to it, imagine you are on a very very hot bus, cramped in with your bags & tons of people, winding up hills & mountains not really knowing where you are going - that will put in in my shoes. ;)

My title of this post is inspired by a line in this song. I like this line because, like the rest of the song, I think it describes, in essence, the Fellowship experience.

"If we could only see what we are becoming..."

That, my friends, is one of the beautiful things about the Fellowship experience.

Thanks to my Sanigest friends for welcoming me & being kind to me. :) Many thanks to all the support I received from friends & family - this journey would not have been possible without you. I am forever grateful to Xavier University & the Brueggeman Center for offering such amazing opportunities for its students. I am beyond blessed to go to such an AMAZING school. And to those who kept up with my blog, THANK YOU! You rock. :)

See you soon, US!

amdg.